The Courage to Be Disliked: The Japanese Phenomenon That Shows You How to Change Your Life and Achieve Real Happiness Paperback – May 7, 2024

In “The Courage to Be Disliked,” authors Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga present a compelling dialogue that bridges the gap between psychology and philosophy, drawing on the principles of Alfred Adler, a founding figure of individual psychology. The book is structured as a conversation between a philosopher and a young man, providing a unique narrative style that engages readers on both intellectual and emotional levels.One of the most significant contributions of this work is its exploration of the human desire for approval versus the necessity of self-acceptance. Kishimi and Koga argue that the need for recognition from others often leads to a life dictated by external expectations, thereby stifling personal growth. They challenge readers to cultivate the courage to be disliked, a radical notion in a society that often prioritizes conformity and seeks validation through social acceptance.The authors delve into the importance of embracing one’s individuality and the role of community in fostering personal development. They advocate for accountability to oneself and the value of authentic relationships over superficial connections. This perspective is particularly relevant in today’s hyper-connected world, where social media often blurs the lines between genuine interactions and performative relationships.Moreover, the book resonates with biblical principles, emphasizing themes of personal responsibility and the transformative power of self-acceptance. Readers familiar with spiritual teachings will find profound connections between Adlerian psychology and scriptures that promote love, understanding, and community engagement.The dialogue format maintains a refreshing pace, inviting readers into a philosophical inquiry that prompts introspection. With each turn of the page, Kishimi and Koga’s insights provoke thought and reflection, offering practical guidance that readers can apply to their own lives.While some may find the ideas challenging or even counterintuitive, “The Courage to Be Disliked” ultimately serves as an empowering manifesto for anyone seeking to break free from the shackles of societal expectations. It encourages a shift in mindset, proposing that true happiness lies in the acceptance of oneself rather than the pursuit of external approval.In conclusion, “The Courage to Be Disliked” is not merely a self-help book; it is a philosophical treatise that compels readers to rethink their understanding of self-worth, relationships, and personal freedom. Whether you are a seasoned scholar or a curious newcomer to these concepts, this book is a valuable addition to your library—an enlightening read that promises to foster growth and enhance one’s journey towards self-discovery.

A great book to live your own life and chart your own destiny. It makes hard concepts easy to understand. I love the method of organization, where the author uses a student to teacher dialogue to tell the story. I would read this book annually.

Good book. I like how the man and the boy go back and forth. Very insightful and makes you think.

This book really challenged how I see myself and my relationships. It’s written like a conversation, which makes the deep stuff feel easier to digest—but don’t get it twisted, it will make you pause and reflect.It’s not just about not caring what people think—it’s about taking full responsibility for your own life and finding freedom in that. Some parts were uncomfortable (in a good way), and it definitely left me with a few "ah-ha" moments. If you’re in a season of growth or just feeling stuck, this book is a powerful mindset shift.

I really like some of the paradigm shifts this book points out and the philosopher/ youth dialogue is a fun way to read and understand the messages the author is trying to convey.

Hello! My name is Monica, and I am a people pleaser. When I saw The Courage to be Disliked by Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga I knew I needed to read it. The courage to be disliked is something I need in my life!The cover of the book is simple, yet elegant. Peaceful. I like the colors and the image. It’s definitely inviting. I was very excited to read it and gain all this wisdom and knowledge—and change my life!Then, I opened the book to the introduction. Maybe I should have realized this beforehand, but I didn’t. The entire book is written in dialogue form. The whole thing is a big conversation. Honestly, I was upset but decided to give it a try and keep reading.I’m sure there are great amounts of wisdom in this book, but I don’t think I’m smart enough to glean them from the text. I read the whole book, and the conversational format completely threw me off.Philosophy is not my jam. I know the names of Freud, Socrates, Plato, and Aristotle, but I have no idea what they taught or discussed. Yes, I’m showing my own ineptitude here, but that’s why I wanted to read the book. I wanted to learn and understand more about philosophy. In my opinion, this book is not the way to go to do that.What did I want? Well, I need a philosophy for dummies book. Start at the very beginning and explain, in detail, who the philosophers are and what they believe or teach. Give definitions, examples, and more examples so I can highlight them, take notes in the margins, and have time to think and process the info. The conversational format did not allow for that at all. The conversation moved on and left my understanding lying on the ground behind it.Another thing I had a difficult time with was that there are several anti-Christian references, which I didn't like. He also makes it seem like you can just think your way out of ADHD and mental illness. Sorry--I live with and love a few people with ADHD and mental illness, and it’s not that easy.If you have more of a background in philosophy and psychology, and if you understand the different philosophies of Freud and Adler, then this book may be more for you!Did I gain the courage to be disliked from The Courage to be Disliked? Ummmm…no. Sadly, I did not. It’s ok, though! I’ll keep working on it!Content Rating: PG-Profanity: None-Intimacy: None-Violence: NoneAge Recommendation: 16+ (Younger readers will not understand or care.)3/5 stars

Great read that gets you thinking about why you care so much about the opinions of others. The psychology behind why you see yourself the way you do, what you can do instead, and what cam change when you live more in line with yourself are included.Definitely one to read again every once in a while.